David Dhawan the maker of all the No.1s with Govinda returns to Bollywood after a long hiatus with his attempt at remaking the classic Chashme Baddoor and it appears the laziness in the remake isn’t limited to the unoriginal title.
Not having seen the original which everyone who I spoke to remembers fondly I went in as a blank slate ready to be transported to the typically David Dhawanian utopia where pelvic thrusts are a professional qualification second to none. In that aspect I wasn’t disappointed there are pelvic thrusts and then some and most of them come courtesy Siddharth who plays the wannabe actor Jai
Pelvic thrusts aside there is very little that is reminiscent of the David Dhawan of the past. Dhawan specializes in mass-appeal, loud, self-deprecating humor that is at times annoying but mostly enjoyable fare with not a lot of grey-cell workout required.
The three friends are played by Ali Zafar, Siddharth, and Divyendu Sharma and object of their affection is played by newcomer Tapsee Pannu. Ali Zafar who ruined a perfectly enjoyable “Mere Brother Ki Dulhan” is relentless in his endeavor of ruining another movie here. For someone as good looking and talented (in my books if you can sing you are talented) he is wooden and unlikeable in every shape and form as Sid. He tries to channel everyone from shah rukh khan to dev anand and the end result is less than successful. Divyendu who shot to fame with his angst-ridden Nishant in Pyaar ka Panchnama is equally annoying as the shayaari spewing Omi. Neither of his 50000000 Shayaaris is funny. The southern superstar Siddharth who garnered favorable reviews in Rang De Basanti manages to expunge the last of the carried forward good-will with this role. New-comer Tapsee is thinned down version of Zarine Khan in both size and talent and that is saying something for Tapsee’s talent as Zarine is practically size-zero in the talent department. Everything is loud and crass and thoughtless.
Why does Anupam Kher do movies like these? There are surely better things that are offered to him as the premiere character actor of Bollywood but for every Wednesday he does another 50 Chashme Baddoor. Here in a double role which serves no purpose he is doubly wasted. The only bit of charm and genuine warmth to be sought comes from Rishi Kapoor and Lillette Dubey as the past-prime singletons they are charming in the limited time they spend on screen but again it begs the question what purpose do these characters serve other than the mandatory Chamko reference which also seems as out of place as the hair-do on Zafar’s head during the final song.
Speaking of the music – it is mostly unintelligent noise which assaults your eardrums with the power of a super-sonic jet. The editing is non-existent and the entire movie seems like a giant puzzle which a 2 year old put together trying to force pieces where they don’t belong. Continuity is left in the cold storage on the same shelf as coherence and consciousness – sample this – in each of the flashbacks – the girl’s clothes don’t change but the guys are all wearing different outfits, as the forlorn lover when Zafar walks in with a bottle of alcohol it is clearly a screw-top bottle but when they pop it its magically turned into a bottle of champagne.
The anti-Tobacco PSA which played at the starting of the movie and during the intermission were more enjoyable than the entire movie and that is the final insult I can hurl at this waste of time and money.